WonNovels

When I was 30 years old, I was ready to quit my job, and this secret love that no one knew about came to an end.  

It took me five years to work my way up from assistant to Lu Si-nian's chief secretary, and another three years to make him inseparable from me. 

In the end, it took me five minutes to write my resignation report and one second to submit it. 

1

When I handed in my resignation report, Lu Si-nian frowned slightly and raised his eyes to stare at me quietly and slowly: 

“Give me a reason.”

I looked down to avoid his eyes, pulling the corners of my mouth to squeeze out a smile as sincere as possible: 

“Mr. Lu, I'm 30 years old this year, and I'm old enough to get married”.  

I thought for a moment and added: 

“Not long ago, my boyfriend proposed to me.” 

In order to be able to resign successfully, I told an insignificant lie.

Lu Shi Nian's fingers tapped the desktop one by one, which meant that he was extremely annoyed. 

Perhaps I should be glad that at least he wasn't that indifferent to my departure.

After a long time, Lu Shi Nian handed me the resignation report:

“I can grant you marriage leave, and I hope you'll give the resignation matter some thought.”  

For a moment, I faltered, an almost compelling voice in my head chattering: 

“Say yes, say yes, at least you'll get to see him all the time.” 

Another voice admonished me:

“Jiang Yu, he's getting engaged. It's immoral to have a crush on a married man.” 

The hands hung in the air for a long time, but I didn't take them after all: 

“I'm too busy with this job. After I get married, I'd like to return to my family more often.”

“I'll take care of everything I have to do. I'm sorry, Mr. Lu.”  

At this point, Lu Shi Nian stopped talking and said faintly: 

“I know, happy wedding.” 

Before leaving the office, Lu Shi Nian had already buried himself in his work again.

After all, for him, I'm just a subordinate, at best the best one to use. 

2

That day, I sat in my seat, looking at the pot of green plants on the table, and had a rare moment to lose myself.

I seldom have this kind of dull time, my daily work is very busy, both to coordinate the daily work on the arrangement, but also part-time Lu Si-nian's life assistant.  

My cell phone is on standby 24 hours a day, and as long as Lu Shi Nian needs me, I have to be there right away, one person as several people. 

Of course, Lu Shi Nian also gave me a high enough annual salary, a few years of time for me to realize the economic freedom. 

Xiao Meng called me several times in a row before I came to my senses.

“Sister Jiang, Mr. Lu asked me to tell you that you should go over and arrange the evening party first.” 

The evening party was to welcome Shen Bai, who had just returned from studying abroad, and the people attending were all the ones from Lu Shi Nian's coterie. 

The young generation of several big families were both rich and noble, with eyes higher than the sky. 

As a matter of fact, outsiders are not welcome in their circle, but it can't be helped, I'm just too good at what I do.  

There are too few people who can take care of everyone's emotional preferences and organize the banquet without a single mistake. 

When I arrived at the venue, I worked non-stop to arrange it. 

From the dishes to the drinks to the snacks, as well as the taboos, likes and dislikes of the young masters, I gave them all instructions. 

“Take away all the lilies from the banquet. Mr. Jiang is allergic.”

“Dim the lights, Mr. Qin's eyes have just been operated on.”

“Remember to prepare the monkey kui that Mr. Shen likes to drink.” 

As the sun was setting and the sky was getting dark, people slowly came in.  

The first to come in was Qin Shi, who greeted me when he saw me: 

“When will Si-nian arrive?” 

I looked at my watch and cautiously replied: 

“He's got a meeting tonight, so I'm guessing another hour.”

He slumped on the couch, looking sickly, his eyes black and blue with fatigue.

I asked someone to turn down the music, and I found a blanket and handed it to him: 

“Autumn night is cold, don't freeze, they still have some time to arrive, you will rest for a while.”  

He laughed as he took the blanket and teased: 

“Say, you really don't consider kicking Lu Si-nian and jumping ship to me, I'll give you twice your salary.” 

There were too many people like them who rushed up and slipped in, so I was extra special. 

Because I had nothing to ask of them, I got along with them openly and honestly, and in turn won a little respect from them. 

Following his words, I smiled back:

“Then I'll really keep that in mind, when there's no place to go, I'll still ask Young Qin to take me in.” 

3  

The night was slightly darker, the street lights were on, and as the lights grew brighter, the people gradually arrived. 

Lu Si-nian was wearing a black overcoat, sandwiched into a wisp of autumn depression. 

I took the coat in his hand, thinking that maybe this is the last time. 

When a group of people are drunk and happy, I found a moment to say that I am ready to leave the matter. 

I've taken care of all of you over the years, so I got up and made a toast to all of you:

“I'm leaving my job, I didn't know anything before, and I've caused a lot of trouble, thank you for your tolerance over the years!

Thank you for your tolerance over the years.” ”I hope to see you again in the future when we are far away from each other.”  

Perhaps it was the gloomy autumn weather that added to the feeling of parting, and the table was a bit quiet for a while. 

Still, Qin Ming raised his wine glass and answered my call, breaking the awkward scene: 

“In the beginning, I always thought that you had ulterior motives for Shi Nian, until now, I really believe it”. 

We all know the meaning of Qin Ming's words, after all, Lu Si Nian's previous secretaries were fired because they confessed their love for him.

After all, Lu Shi Nian's previous secretaries were fired because they confessed to him. Later, Lu Shi Nian simply recruited only male secretaries, but he confessed again, so he got the title of “10,000 People's Fans”.

Someone tapped Lu Shi Nian's shoulder and teased with a smile: 

“I didn't expect it, did I? I didn't think anyone could escape your charms.”  

Lu ƭū₀s Nian absently lit a cigar and scolded with a smile: 

“Get lost.” 

After the meal, a few people got together for a card game to casually pass the time. 

In the middle of the game, Qin Shi asked offhandedly: 

“Lu Shi Nian, that girl from Su's family that your old lady ordered for you, have you seen anyone?” 

My heartbeat missed half a beat, and my hand was in the air for a moment as I poured water.

After a while, Lu Shi Nian replied casually:  

“No, as long as the old lady is happy, it's not a bad idea to marry anyone.” 

The marriages of this group of people have always been mixed with various interests, the result of all kinds of considerations. 

From a certain point of view, they have gained unimaginable resources, and it's fair to pay some price.

It seems that Lu Si-nian has also accepted such rules. 

I've met Su Wan once, a woman from Jiangnan, gentle and lovely, a nice girl.

If possible, I expect Lu Si-nian will have a different ending from others. 4  

The meal continued until late at night, the driver has been waiting outside the house, this side dispersed, then promptly picked up. 

Only Lu Shi Nian's driver had some accidents on the road, so he came a little late. 

So there was a scene of the two of us alone, which I was most reluctant to do, and we stood side by side under the street lamp, and the light stretched our voices out.

Every time this time, those unwillingness and dark thoughts in my heart would rise up. 

Just Lu Si-nian does not know anything, he just stood quietly like that, less sharp than usual due to alcohol.

Not a moment later, the driver finally rushed over.

Lu Shi Nian turned his head to look at me, very gentlemanly asked:  

“Together?” 

I shook my head and duly revealed a smile that was grateful but not too distant: 

“Thank you Mr. Lu, it's just that my fiancé is already on his way.”

So Lu Si-nian said no more, nodded slightly in greeting, and leaned over to enter the car. 

I am finally the only one left in heaven and earth, the masks that I put on in layers during the day can finally be taken off at this moment. 

I kicked the heels on my feet out casually and sat down on the flowerbed, in a rare moment of bewilderment. 

For a moment, I didn't know where I was going.  

Not long after, the sky unexpectedly drifted rain, the first autumn rain after the beginning of autumn, hit the body cold and gloomy. 

I walked out along the road with bare feet, this is a rich area, walked for a long time before I found a taxi point. 

...... 

The road that I often take tonight is under repair, the driver does not know, so I can only circle back and drive out again.

Lu Shi Nian did not expect to see Jiang Yu again, waiting on the side of the road in the rain, one hand carrying a shoe leisurely swaying.

He was a little surprised, did not expect the always dignified and strict secretary Jiang would also have such, er, unconventional side. 

After all, when he saw her in the company in the past, no matter what time of the day, she was always in a sharp suit with her shirt buttoned to the top.  

He had seen many women who unbuttoned and bent over in front of him seemingly unintentionally, and Secretary Jiang was an exception. 

That's why he rehired her, partly because of her professionalism and partly because of her understanding of proportion. 

Almost skimming past her, the driver asked from the front: 

“Do you want to give Secretary Jiang a ride?” 

Lu Snian's eyes did not ripple as he simply replied:

“No need.”

He had a bad opinion of her fiancé, Secretary Jiang was a smart man, but his eyes didn't look too good now.  

However, this kind of thing, like people drink water, cold and warm, he is not good to interfere more. 

5 

I'm not sure if I saw Lu Si-nian's car, but it was a flash, maybe I was wrong.

The rich area may be very few like me to take a taxi, the driver is from far away to here. 

I stood there until my legs went a little numb before finally waiting for my car. 

By the time I got home it was already two or three in the morning and the whole house was silent. 

To the outside world, I tell everyone that I have a happy family, a fiancé who loves me, and a lot of friends.  

People often look at me enviously and say: life is so, enough to complete. 

But in reality, I have nothing, no family, no lover, no friends. 

When I was in junior high school, my mom got breast cancer, middle to late stage. 

After she had her breasts cut off, it came back in less than half a year. 

On an ordinary morning, my dad left for work and never came back.

He took all the money in the family and left my mom and me as minors.

After learning the news, my mom was unusually calm; she was silent as she underwent chemotherapy, was hospitalized, and occasionally cooked for me when she was in good shape.  

One evening when I came home from school, my mom prepared a table full of food, and she sat across the table looking at me with a smile on her face. 

I don't know why, but I felt an inexplicable ŧű- of fear, and the dishes on the table had a strange smell near the tip of my nose. 

I thought of the bottle of my mom's new rat poison in the bathroom, and that day I knew for the first time that my mom's hand was so strong, so strong that I couldn't break it. 

A strong desire to survive made me break away from my mom while she wasn't looking, and I panicked and somehow managed to run to the rooftop.

My mom was crying as she opened her arms towards me and said incoherently: 

“Nui Nui, the world is so bad, mommy doesn't want to leave you here alone.” 

“Come with me, we'll be mother and daughter again in our next life.”  

I cried too. I was so tired and missed the smell of laundry detergent in my mom's arms. 

That's it, I thought, there's nothing good about living. 

That night, the wind on the rooftop was so strong, and my mom's embrace was so warm. My mom held my hand and walked towards the edge step by step. 

The moment I was about to fall, I was pulled by a pair of soulful, strong hands.

He had a death grip on me, no matter how much I struggled. 

As I fluttered in the wind, all I could make out was a pair of amazingly bright eyes.

Later I survived, but my mom died.  

That man was Lu Si-nian, who not only saved me, but also gave me a reason to live - to 

to repay the favor. 

I felt like I had betrayed my mom. I was like a drowning man, desperate to grab a piece of driftwood. 

And Lu Shi Nian was that driftwood. 

Then the fire trucks, police cars, and ambulances came, and in the midst of the crowd, I grabbed his hand and looked up at him:

“How can I repay you?”

I still remember 16-year-old Lu Shi Nian looking down at me and telling me earnestly:  

“Then remember to come to me.” 

My life seemed to be trapped in the night my mom died, and Lu Shi Nian was the only thing I could look forward to. 

6 

That night I was consumed by dreams as usual, dreams of the past. 

I saw my mom at the end of the line questioning why I didn't go with her, and I saw that one silent look in my dad's eyes before he left the house. 

When I woke up in a sweat, I realized that I could no longer speak at the top of my lungs.

When I took my temperature, it was 38 degrees 8.  

If I were my usual self, I would have taken a fever-reducing pill and gone back to work as if nothing had happened. 

But this time, I took a rare vacation. I needed some time to think about my future. 

...... 

When Lu Shi Nian arrived at the company, he found that Secretary Jiang did not come, and when he asked, he realized that he had taken a leave of absence due to illness.

He frowned, his impression of her so-called fiancé completely defeated.

Secretary assistant Xiao Meng temporarily replaced Jiang Yu's work, she served a cup of coffee. 

Lu Snian sipped it slowly and methodically, his expression unchanged.  

The sugar had been put in an extra one, he didn't say anything, he just took a sip and didn't drink any more. 

The morning of the meeting information preparation again made a mistake, good thing he already know the focus of this negotiation, this is not a big deal. 

The temperature in the office was one degree lower, the humidifier was not turned on, and his throat was a little dry. 

One day down, I can't say where there is a problem, just everywhere there is a sense of impropriety.

Lu Si-nian thought of Jiang Yu for the first time, he seems to rarely think of her, because she seems to have never had any sense of existence.

Jiang Yu's propriety is the kind of propriety that turns spring breeze into rain and moistens things silently.

You couldn't feel her presence, but everything was just right.  

He frowned, this was the second time he frowned today. 

For that unlucky fiancé of Jiang Yu's who snatched away his chief secretary general. 

...... 

After lying down for a day and thinking about it, I still haven't figured out where I want to go from here.

It's like a boat lost in the ocean, unable to recognize east and west, south and north. 

So the next morning, went to work again honestly. 

When I arrived at the office, Xiao Meng carefully looked at me and quietly said:  

“Mr. Lu doesn't seem to be in a good mood, and he only took a sip of yesterday morning's coffee.” 

Last night's coffee was still on the table, I dipped my hand in a little, sipped it and instructed: 

“I put in one more sugar, three cubes of sugar, not one more, not one less.”

I carefully demonstrated the coffee again, Xiao Meng watched carefully. 

When the coffee was Ţūₗ ready, Lu Si-nian arrived at the company.

I don't know if it was my illusion, but the corners of his lips when he looked at me were a little higher than usual, as well as a little bit of resentment hidden in his eyes. 

7  

The handover was more troublesome than I had imagined, I held too many jobs and it wasn't that easy to hand them over all at once. 

Moreover, Lu Si-nian is never a good waiter, the life of the big and small things have to be carefully instructed. 

So simply took a book, from small to big things, think of what to write on what. 

This delay, the original plan of a month to hand over the work can only be postponed, and then bumped into the thing I do not want to do.

I went to the airport to pick up Su Wan to go to the old house, I have a mischievous heart towards Lu Si-nian, although I did not do anything, but there are always a few points of guilt when I see the main body.

Su Wan was wearing a moon white cheongsam, with a piece of emerald green jade hanging around her neck, which was worth a lot of money at a glance, and her hair was coiled up with a hairpin, the kind of nobility that can be seen at a glance in the crowd. 

I raised my smile and greeted her:  

“Miss Su, Mr. Lu asked me to pick you up.” 

Along the way, Su Wan asked me some things about Lu Si-nian, it was inevitable that she was apprehensive about getting married to someone she had only met a few times. 

I could see the uneasiness in her heart, so I comforted her with a warm voice: 

“Lu is a very good person, Ms. Su doesn't need to worry, if there is anything you can always come to me.”

She heard this and looked up at me gratefully.

All the way to the old mansion in a rambling reply, originally brought people ready to leave.

Elder Lu called out to me. He is the earlier years of the shopping mall famous iron blood wrist, now more than seventy years old, still hale and hearty, especially a pair of eyes sharp and forceful.  

“Secretary Su, where is Shi Nian?” 

Lu Shi Nian didn't come to the old mansion? 

Face unchanged, I replied cautiously:

“There's a bit too much going on at the company today, Mr. Lu might be a bit late.” 

Elder Lu coldly grunted and mercifully asked me to bring Lu Shi Nian back.

I've seen Mr. Lu perform the family law on Lu Si-nian with my own eyes, six lashes, blood scars, and now Lu Si-nian still has marks on his back. 

Outside the door I began to quickly dial Lu Shi Nian's phone, thank God, dialed to the third time, he finally answered the phone.  

8 

I asked him where he was in a hurry, but he didn't answer and called out my name for a long time: 

“Jiang Yu.”

The tone of his voice was chaotic, as if he had been drinking, and the sound of the sea breeze was loud in his ears. 

I thought I knew where he was, and when I hurried over there-- 

I saw Lu Si-nian leaning against the reef on the coast, a few cans of white wine sold in the supermarket beside him, his hair disheveled in the night breeze. 

When he heard the commotion, he raised his eyes to look at me, his eyes looked like they were covered with a layer of fog, but they were still sharp, like he was drunk, but also like he wasn't drunk.  

“You're here? Wait a moment, I'll be ready in a minute.” 

Lu Shi Nian gently patted the seat beside him, signaling me to go over: 

“Have a chat.” 

Lu's mansion is located not far from the sea cliffs. At night, it is brightly lit, but it does not lose its ancient charm because of its pavilion and pavilion design. 

Lu Shi Nian suddenly asked:

“Is it nice?”

My eyes were still stuck on his beautiful jawline, and I subconsciously replied:

“It's nice.”

I was suddenly flushed red, but he didn't pay attention to me and just continued:

“But in fact, inside is a tomb, white jade as a hall, gold as a horse, so what, inside the burial is just a countless number of withered bones.”

He was saying this with a smile, but the words were all serious.

Rumorṱû₈ has it that Lu's fortune wasn't clean, more or less involved in some gray areas, and is in a transition phase these years.

I followed him for seven years, watching how he step by step grasped the power of Lu's group.

How many of these bloody winds, guns and arrows, not for outsiders to say.

So he will also be tired? I thought so and asked so:

“Are you happy?”

The word “happy” turned around on the tip of his tongue, and he suddenly smiled, but did not answer my question.

Instead, he looked at me and said:

“Not with your fiancé.”

I froze, but he didn't say another word, just nodded and apologized:

“Sorry, I crossed the line.”

Lu Si-nian finished the last sip of wine in his hand, then got up, raising his eyes, he was again that reserved and incomparable Mr. Lu.

9

On the way home, I have been thinking about what Lu Shi Nian's words mean.

After thinking for a long time, I couldn't get an answer, just like I couldn't figure out why he appeared alone on the rooftop of that dilapidated building more than ten years ago.

But everything has nothing to do with me anymore, because I'm leaving my job.

I'm afraid I won't be able to see him again.

The day I left my job was a rainy day, the rain in the south is always so fine and dense, pattering, as if there is never an end.

I sat on the position, silent packing things.

I stayed in this position for nearly ten years, from the early twenties of nothing to today's unique.

I know that every morning at nine o'clock, the sunlight slants down on the cactus I keep.

I also knew that as long as I quietly stood on tiptoe, I could see Lu Si-nian's silhouette through the gap.

I once stumbled through this world with these, but now I'm leaving.

I have repaid the favor of a life for eight years, and it is time for Su Wan to accompany him for the rest of the years.

Xiao Meng looked at me with tears in her eyes. I wiped away her tears and said with a smile:

“Silly, it's not like we won't see each other again.”

In my heart, I knew that I would never see her again.

This city has left me with too much pain, so I should leave.

When I turned around to leave, I still had some regrets. What I regretted was that I had deliberately delayed for so long, but I had never seen Lu Si-nian again for the last time.

After leaving, I slept at home, as if to make up for all these years of lack of sleep at once.

I also bought wine, the TV is turned up to the maximum sound.

A comedy movie was playing on TV, and I laughed like a fool.

After laughing, and froze sitting on the ground, looking around the pitch-black piece, at a loss for words.

When I was a kid, my biggest wish was to study well, as long as my grades were good, my mom and dad wouldn't fight.

Then my dad left, and my wish was to make a lot of money so that my mom could live.

Then my mom died, my wish is to become Lu Shi Nian's best assistant, he is happy, I will also be happy.

But now I suddenly don't know where to go.

In the middle of a daze, the doorbell suddenly rang, and when I looked through the cat's eye, it was Lu Si-nian.

I opened the door in a hurry, only to suddenly realize that I was still wearing pink rabbit pajamas.

It was too late to close the door again, so I could only stiffly invite the person back, trying to show a still professional smile.

10

Looking calmer than my cluelessness, Lu Shi Nian explained:

“I called you.”

“Today, this document is too urgent, and I couldn't find the backup copy for a while, so I just drove to the neighborhood.”

The redness on my face was only for a moment, and I quickly changed to my professional smile:

“Yes, Mr. Lu, please take a seat, I need to look it up.”

While I was looking up the documents, Lu Si-nian was sitting on the sofa, his upbringing made him not look around, so he just stared at me.

It made me feel like I was on pins and needles, just the more I panicked, the more I couldn't find it.

Lu Shi Nian laughed and comforted, “Take your time.”

Then he asked: “Doesn't Secretary Jiang's fiancé live here?”

I subconsciously lied:

“He comes back at night.”

After searching for half an hour, I was able to organize all the necessary documents and print them out for Lu Shi Nian.

Lu Shi Nian took the documents and for some reason suddenly looked at me with a fixed stare that made me furious.

I just wanted to open my mouth, but he suddenly smiled, still the kind of smile that makes people feel like spring breeze but with a distance:

“I'm getting married soon, and I really can't find a suitable person to take care of it, I wonder if Secretary Jiang could do me a favor? I'll pay the salary as it is.”

I didn't have the experience of refusing Lu Snian, my body had already given the answer before my mind.

Inexplicably, I nodded my head, then looked at the man in front of me and smiled lightly, the words that came to my mouth somehow swallowed down again.

After that day, I returned to Lu Shi Nian side, responsible for his engagement ceremony.

I think maybe it's good to see him get married, in order to really die.

11

Because I have a guilty conscience towards Su Wan, I do everything myself, hoping that she will have a perfect engagement ceremony.

But Lu Si-nian did not know what he was busy with during this period of time, and rarely came over, and only contacted me alone if there was anything, and then I explained what he wanted.

It's as if this isn't his engagement party, but someone else's.

Su Wan's look became more and more despondent day by day, and when she was trying on the gown that day, she looked at me somewhat pleadingly:

“Secretary Jiang, help me ask if he's coming over today.”

According to my professionalism, I shouldn't have made this call, but I did, and when the phone was connected, Lu Si-nian's voice came through:

“Hello?”

The background is very noisy, Lu Si-nian's voice with a little bit of drunken hoarse, he is in a drinking game.

Originally, I wanted to hang up the phone, and remembered Su Wan's mournful look, I deliberated and carefully said:

“The dress arrived today, do you want to come to the old mansion?”

The opposite side did not make a sound for a long time, I just wanted to apologize for overstepping my bounds, Lu Si-nian spoke:

“Yes, you can come and pick me up.”

I didn't know why he wanted me to pick him up, but I did it anyway.

When I arrived, the drinking party had already dispersed, and Lu Shi Nian was the only one lying drunk on the sofa.

I half squatted on the floor, gently patted him and called out:

“Mr. Lu, Mr. Lu.”

He suddenly raised his head and looked straight at me, his eyes sharp as a blade, I was a bit dazed.

But only for a second, soon he changed back to the hazy eyes haunted by alcohol, as if just now was just a momentary blurring of my eyes.

I helped him and stumbled to the car, where he fell asleep as soon as we arrived.

Through the reflector, I can just see his face, I rarely have the opportunity to be able to look at him in the open, so I did not hold back to look at two more eyes.

The guilt in my heart for Su Wan deepened a few more points, I retracted my eyes and recited the mantra of clearing the heart several times.

Somehow, my heart suddenly became vaguely uneasy, I have always trusted my intuition, my mind quickly began to turn.

No, there was a black SUV behind me that had been following me for half an hour since just now.

“Mr. Lu, M